Shopping Daze in the North

Dammit, the old lady’s off for a couple days and someone brought me a total PITA build that took up my whole weekend.
Like are your wives like mine? Like some babushka from Soviet Russia that can spend 6 hours in the Superstore - oh look they make purple bottles too - Wow! there;'s l;ike 3 brands of deoderant - gee it comes in a 600ml bottle too!
While the dog and I go walkies and spend another hour in the car watching the rain come down. Especially in Vanderhoof, there’s so much radio static even CBC is overpowered. Only the Jesus station comes in clear…


Yep. My wife slips into a fever-dream/coma every time she ventures in to Shoppers or Hellmart. She loves parading up and down the aisles comparison shopping. I don’t get it. Heh.

I’ve never seen someone take 2 hours to get a carton of milk in the Superstore until I got married.

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Not just the Superstore… she can go in a 600 sq ft Dollar Store and 45 minutes later I can’t find her. As if she zips to the very end of the aisle and presses herself against it, as no matter what store you can look down every aisle and see nothing…
I used to tell my buds that women enter a “shopping dimension” that men can’t.

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I’m not part of the shopping cult.
My wife mentioned that we needed several cans of split pea soup. I casually mentioned that I would go to Safeway and purchase the items. My wife was gob-smacked, aghast, and horrified. She leveled a steely gaze at me and flatly stated: “they’re not on sale at Safeway.”
It is my understanding that this means something.

Mine thinks “on sale” chocolate bars are good for diabetes.
We just made a pizza with Jimmy P’s “Welfare Family” brand dough. Had to post about it on FB -
Well that was disgusting. Jimmy P’s “Welfare Family” brand does it again with a pizza dough that bakes up into a hard crusted, leathery texture reminiscent of the 17th Century bread baked up at Fortress Louisburg Historic Site. Complete with an off-putting taste like it was stored since 1759 too.

Also adhered to the $25 nonstick pizza pan like a layer of cyanoacetate, so that was an expensive cooking lesson for us. Glad she used budget local toppings so we didn’t toss $50 worth of Italian stuff from the Deli in Prince George out with it.

Yes, I’m really, really nit-picky about food. When the server at a restaurant asks if I’d like a doggie bag, I’ve been known to reply - No thanks. I LIKE my dog.