Loose Lexicon

I totally forgot to look for this one last year. Enjoy, and feel free add any new words:

The Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are the 2009 winners:

  1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

  2. Ignoranus (n.): A person who’s both stupid and an asshole.

  3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

  4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

  5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

  6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

  7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high

  8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.

  9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

  10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

  11. Karmageddon: It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer, right?

  12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

  13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

  14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

  15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.

  16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

  17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating.

#3 is funny - I like it and I will use it  :smiley: