Buddy and Edna

Buddy and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year,
And every year Buddy would say,
'Edna,I’d like to ride in that helicopter.'
Edna always replied,
'I know Buddy, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks,
And fifty bucks is fifty bucks’
One year Buddy and Edna went to the fair, and Buddy said,
'Edna, I’m 85 years old…
If I don’t ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.‘
To this, Edna replied,
"Buddy that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks.’'
The pilot overheard the couple and said,
'Folks I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don’t say a word I won’t charge you a penny!
But if you say one word it’s fifty dollars.'
Buddy and Edna agreed and up they went.
The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard.
He did his daredevil tricks over and over again,
But still not a word.
When they landed, the pilot turned to Buddy and said,
'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn’t.
I’m impressed!'
Buddy replied,
‘Well, to tell you the truth,
I almost said something when Edna fell out,
But you know,
"Fifty bucks is fifty bucks!’

I love it!!


This is one I saw in the Readers Digest a while ago.

From heaven, God looked down into hell one day.
He saw a great deal of construction going on and yelled to the devil to
find out what was going on. The devil laughed and told Him that they were getting some of the finest architects and contractors as residents and were remodeling hell.
God became a bit jealous and told the devil to send a couple of architects and builders up to heaven so they could do some improvements.
The devil just smirked and told God to ‘Go to heaven’!
God became very angry and yelled to the devil that if he didn’t send them up he would sue!
The devil laughed and yelled back, “Oh yeah! Where are you going to find a lawyer”?

At a speech in Hyde Park a man who was having some problems with the justice system finally lost it and yelled “All lawyers are assholes”!
From the crowd a voice was heard “I resent that”!
The speaker regained his composure and said “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you were a lawyer”.
“I’m not” came the reply, “I’m an asshole”!!