No, everyone DOESN’T go through such a stage. You have a choice and you make your choice.
Thank you Jesus for sharing your own experience. It reminded me of my cousin who was raised in a very strict environment and then, when the freedom of university dorm fell upon him, became a binge drinker for a couple of years.
I think you may have some valid points about the " rebel young" attitude. However you say yourself that a lot of your friends didn’t snap out of it and are now totally f***ed up. So your own experience isn’t the same as everyone else. You ended up being aware of the dangers and now, you understand limits.
As you say yourself, peer pressure is a deciding factor for many. In order for peer pressure to take effect, peers have to be around. So if a teenager shows up to one of these parties, the pressure to drink and maybe do other stuff will be there. If the social occasion didn’t include drinking ( ie, jam night among musician friends, bonfire without booze, dinner party, movie night, video game night, sports night, whatever…) the peer pressure wouldn’t push them towards drinking.
Drinking in the teenage years seems to be viewed as something mature to do. And since it is like a forbidden fruit, it seems like a cool thing to do. I know, I was a teenager too. However, the casual attitude towards drinking that seems to be prevalent in this town is what surprises me. It seems that it doesn’t matter if teens do it regularly because the excuse is always " oh well, they will do it anyway!" and it also seems that publicizing it isn’t a problem (picture galleries on htmf).
Thank you Jesus! Praise the lord!
It really shoulnt be a big deal until it becomes a problem… The reason alot of my friends didnt snap out of it was because they just didnt see it as that big of a deal oh coke its just once in a while… then its more and more. However this is after 3 years of heavy drinking in which i got to this point and thn stopped.
Let them have their fun let them show it off to their friends but dont let them fuck up their lives.
[quote=“jesus”]
Let them have their fun let them show it off to their friends but dont let them fuck up their lives.[/quote]
I don’t really understand how you reason.
It seems you are saying to the parents, let them binge drink and have their fun but if someone has an accident then it is a problem so now they should stop. In other words, take the chance that nothing serious is going to happen to them (like car accident, date rape, hard drug addiction, serious fighting), but if something happens, then the parents can step in and say that’s enough.
Wouldn’t that be a bit late?
umm actually im saying teach your kids right from wrong and how to stay out of dangerous situations… then have faith in them kids are smarter than you would think and retain more of what their parents say than they will ever admit to. So the solution is simple talk to them teach them right from wrong and then let them live their lives. If they develop a drinking problem then step in until then leave them alone to do what they want.
I see your point. It’s probably part of the solution. I think faith in kids is essential but I also think that teens must have faith in their parents too. It should be a two-way thing.
What do you think about what I was saying earlier:
Do you think it is a Rupert thing or is it the same everywhere?
No it’s not just Rupert. It’s everywhere, but in larger places the kids are puking up the back of buses or taxis or staying over. In smaller towns we see them stumbling down the streets, or worse fish what’s left out of crushed or rolled cars.
Some parents have the attitude that kids will do it anyway and allow them to do it in their homes, where they can keep an eye one them. I think that’s crap.
We parents know, we did all this shit and that’s why some of us have attitudes. We wasted years, lost friends and watched the ones who couldn’t handle it raise another hopeless generation.
Getting blotto is normal once in a while. But you look really stupid to straight people, and they’re the ones that are gonna hire you, or get all worked up when they catch their daughter with you. Have some respect and do it in private.
If you look forward to getting drunk, you’ve already got a problem.
My best friend thought bingeing was better than steady drinking. He killed TWO livers. He didn’t live to see his daughters graduate. I sometimes wake up from a dream where he and I were doing stuff as buddies, and have to suffer through a period of emotions. He was just my best friend, imagine how his wife and kids feel. Shit like this happens. We never expected it to happen to people we know. We were kids too.
“The only people harder to teach than teenagers are teachers. Teachers have a diploma that says they already know everything”
You can’t change what teenagers do or think. It’s up to them to decide if they wan’t to drink, or if they wan’t to stay away from it. When teenagers want to do something they will, if they wan’t to quit drinking they will. It has nothign to do with peer pressure or parental involvement. It has to be up to the teenager to decide how he/she wants to live his/her life. I make my own decisions. I don’t drink to be “cool” or to rebel against society or parents or whatever, it’s just something that I choose to do.
Thanks to you too ngillis for sharing your thoughts on this. Could you share with us why you choose to drink? I mean, I am curious to see why you would choose this over doing something else that may be more dangerous (drugs), or less costly ( video night with friends), or healthier ( sports), or even more socially accepted (volunteerism). I am not implying that you don’t do some of the more positive things suggested. I am just curious about your choice.
No kiddin. No f.n. kiddin. Your telling it to the choir here, fella. I’m raising my 3rd. 4th if you count my ex with a Wendy complex (i’m never growing up!)
But it’s my JOB. I’d be a negligent parent if I didn’t TRY. One day it’ll be your job too and you’ll do your best to influence them as well. it’s like a buried subroutine deep in the brainstem.
Resistance is futile.
Your parents are the Borg.
You will become the Borg.
woah woah woah…everyone is looking too far into this. Replacing livers? I mean come on. Some kids have very addictive personalities and will turn alcohol into a huge problem, but most don’t. Most of them figure it out fairly early. After a few weekends hugging the toilet bowl they figure out how much they can tolerate. Whatever parents haven’t taught their kids… life will. Don’t worry so much, your kids aren’t that stupid.
And here’s proof:
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=165&pos=13
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=165&pos=46
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=138&pos=2
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=8&pos=0
Look at all these people so intent on analyzing, dissecting, criticizing, and influencing other peoples lives.
Like it or not, agree with our reasonings or not, it’s our choice.
Just because someone makes a choice that you don’t entirely agree upon, or understand, doesn’t mean they can’t think for themselves.
It’s my choice to drink, and I do often enough. But it’s not my duty to defend or justify myself. Nor should it be anybody elses duty to force their views, or demand an explanation from someone else.
Let’s see. There were about 10 kids that were our tight group 'the Burnaby Burnouts’
One decided to see how many times he could run across the freeway on acid. It was two and a half. The girl with him, it was two 1/4.
One fried his liver bingeing and shooting MDA (xtc), then drank the transplant into oblivion.
One got so hammered he fell off the overpass onto the freeway stumbling home.
One ended up like his Dad, works his bag off, drinks with the boys, goes home and drinks til he passes out. He was the ‘chick magnet’ and we hung out with him for the spinoffs. Now hes a lonely 50 yr old pisstank.
One had to choose between his wife and son and beer and doobies with the boys. He took his 6pack and never looked back.
One got a degree in Marin Biology in the 70s, his masters in Computing Science and told IBM at a job interview “Fuck you. I make twice that gutting fish”. He still guts fish until drinking time starts. He was the one we all figured would be a Brainiac. He’s 52 and single. I don’t think he’s figured out that he’s gay yet, so he’s alone.
One stuck to smoking dope and is quite well off and successful. Except he’s 50 and hasn’t figured out that marijuana makes you question yourself, and if your shy it makes you worse. He’s scared of women.
One is a major dealer. With his 3rd old lady. He’s happy and wealthy but his kids won’t see him.
Two of us had a distaste for waking up and not remembering things, or to find your girl with someone who could control themselves. We got married and divorced and have relationships and see our kids (i raised mine). And every few months get drunk, which means like over .08 now and somewhat felling good and maybe even starting to slur before we switch to coffee. And even the odd toke, but everytime that happens we end up having a couple smokes and it’s back to 2 packs a day after quitting for three years.
So seeing as how none of us were from single families, poor or disadvantaged, all of us were honour roll and college or university, our group paid the ferryman.
I forgot to mention i was married to an alcoholic/drug dependent for 20 years. That’s why I’m vocal.
[quote=“Anonymous”]
And here’s proof:
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=165&pos=13
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=165&pos=46
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=138&pos=2
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=8&pos=0[/quote]
Were you there? Don’t make judgement based on pictures.
whoa, i beg to differ, peer pressure has A LOT to do with it, most people won’t admit it but it does, a very close friend of mine used to drink an smoke pot like no tomorrow until he made a decision to quit, the only way he was able to do that was to move away from all his friends cause he couldn’t learn to say no, he’s been back for visits an couldn’t handle it. living away from them he’s done fine, managed to clean up his life, yes there are people who make their own decisions but many can’t. and parental involvement does have an effect, a parent cannot stop a child from drinking or totally prevent one from starting but they can provide enough positive influence for the child to make a decision based on their own values, thats where it has to come from, the people who go nuts in college but not in highschool are the ones who lived by their parents values, the teens who do the best are the ones who have learned their own set of values an make their decisions based on what they want, a parent can help to give their child a similar set of values of responsibility, in the end it is the child who must make the decision an the best a parent can do is to help them make it, but they can help them make it.
and here is why you shouldn’t judge a person solely by a picture…
superiorpics.com/britney_spe … ney069.jpg
looks innocent??? but then…
megaone.com/britney/madonna.html
yah…
sorry the post should have been like this
[quote=“the__girl”]and here is why you shouldn’t judge a person solely by a picture…
totallybritney.com/pictures/ … F00001.jpg
looks innocent??? but then…
megaone.com/britney/madonna.html
yah…[/quote]
[quote=“the__girl”]
And here’s proof:
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=165&pos=13
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=165&pos=46
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=138&pos=2
http://hackingthemainframe.com/coppermine/displayimage.php?album=8&pos=0
Were you there? Don’t make judgement based on pictures.[/quote]
So they were experimenting with a beer bong solely for educational purposes then. Riiiiiiiiiiight.