How to tell you are married


#1

Three women, one engaged, one married and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships, and decide to amaze their men.

That night, all three will wear black leather bras, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes.

After a few days they meet up for lunch.

The engaged woman: “The other night when my boyfriend came over, he found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask. He saw me and said, ‘You are the woman of my life. I love you.’ Then we made love all night long.”

The mistress: “Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office, and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn’t say a word, but we had wild sex all night.”

The married woman: "I sent the kids to stay at my mother’s house for the night. When my husband came home, I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes.

As soon as he came in the door and saw me, he said,

"What’s for dinner, Batman?’’


#2

Hahaha, so sad but so true.


#3

My gf keeps threatening to come home with a keyboard painted across her tits.
“Now will you pay attention to them?” :smiley:


#4

LMAO :smiley:


#5